What’s Love Got to Do with It?
- Jaime K. Devine, PhD
- 2 days ago
- 4 min read
Valentine’s Day is right around the corner. This international celebration of romance commemorates St. Valentine, who was the Catholic patron saint of lovers and marriage… and also travelers, plagues, and beekeeping[1]. I guess even saints need a side hustle. Valentine’s Day was popularized as a romantic occasion by the medieval poet Geoffrey Chaucer[2]. Valentine’s Day cards started to replace love letters as the preferred method to showcase love in the late 1800s. The trend continues. These days, more than 145 million Valentine’s Day cards are estimated to be sent every year[2].
Love exists outside the envelope too. Studies have shown that romantic love is considered highly valuable by societies around the world-- not just the WEIRD (Western, Educated, Industrialized, Rich, and Democratic) ones [3,4]! A 2024 market analysis found that, on average, 74% of the global population feels loved[5]. Global rates on who’s in a relationship is harder to pin down, but over half of Americans reported being in a committed relationship of some sort in 2024[6].
I know you’re thinking, “Nothing gets me in the mood for romance more than global marketing statistics, but what does this have to do with fatigue risk management?” Romance is relevant to fatigue risk management because the bedroom is where the magic happens. And by “magic”, I mean sleep. Sharing the bedroom with a loved one can either improve or impair the quality of your sleep. A 2021 review article in the journal Sleep Medicine Reviews found that higher quality romantic relationships were related to better sleep[7]. Conversely, loneliness or low quality relationships were related to poor sleep. As if dating in 2026 wasn’t hard enough, now I’m telling you a bad romance could result in greater fatigue risk!
How is a good relationship related to good sleep? “Good” is a subjective term, of course, with personal satisfaction being the key indicator of quality. A healthy romantic relationship generally means that all partners feel mutually supported, understood, content, and safe[8]. This overall sense of emotional well-being is considered the major mechanism by which romance improves sleep quality[9]. Being in love is also related to hormonal changes that are beneficial for sleep, like lower inflammation, lower cortisol, and increased oxytocin[9]. Oxytocin is often called the “cuddle hormone” because it is released in response to affective touch (snuggles) or intimate touch (sex). Yep, sex is another way that romance may help sleep. People fall asleep faster after experiencing orgasm[10]. Conversely, poor sleep can result in a diminished sex drive and even sexual dysfunction[11].
On the flip side, sharing your bed with someone isn’t always good for your sleep. Partners may find their sleep impacted if they are in a toxic, abusive, or even just unfulfilling relationship for the same reason they may sleep better in a happier relationship. There can be trouble in paradise even in good relationships. For example, let’s say your partner snores. Snoring is such a disruptive experience in the bedroom that many people only get tested for sleep apnea because their partner was complaining about the noise[12-14]. In general, people with a bed partner seek out treatment for their sleep disorders more readily than people who sleep alone. That’s because sleep disorders can keep partners awake, which partners do not like. If your partner is disrupting your sleep, feel free to nag them into talking about it with their doctor. Alternatively, you can always engage in a “sleep divorce”, which is a dramatic ways of saying you sleep in separate rooms to avoid annoying each other.
How about single people? Most of the data suggests that the positive impact of romance is really related to being happy. If you are happier as a single person than you would be in a relationship, then I don’t recommend swiping right on a stranger just because you need a second opinion on whether you snore. If you are dissatisfied with your sleep, you can always make a date with a sleep medical professional.
References
Comments